Friendly Reciprocation

When we're young I think we all imagine we'd have best friends that last forever, that those people will always be there just like when we are preteens.  Friends that are there to talk to, there to be supportive when we go thru breakups and makeups, and accomplishments, setbacks and losses.  Then we grow up, we grow apart and some people just don't make the same effort anymore; families are built and friendships get put on the back burner.   Friends even distance themselves intentionally because of differences in lifestyle or general opinions on how they live life.

We can probably assume the same things about family; sometimes they are supportive and sometimes they aren't.  Often, we can question whether we are rooting for each other or are questioning our own positions in life based off of others.  There are periods of closeness and eternities of separation that exist among people that claim to love one another.

What these two examples have in common is distance amongst similarity.  As human beings we are all experiencing the same feelings, just in a different order.  Pain, loss, happiness, triumph, accomplishment, loneliness...it happens to all of us, just at different times in various milestones.  It's not a competition because no two life paths are ever meant to be the same so to bother comparing is a waste of time.  But the actual feelings we experience are the same.  So I question why the separation, why the isolation, why the lack of support, competition, comparison and polarity?  Why is all of this necessary?  Maybe I'm just idealistic to think that we can be compassionate, understanding and supportive individuals even if we are different?  The pain from the examples I mention lies in the fact that friends and family are supposed to treat you the best and yet they also have the ability to hurt you the most.  It's not in how long you've known someone or in whether or not you have the same bloodline that makes a person supportive...its about choice in presence.  How are you going to show up for your friend, or sister or mother today?  What will you do today that matters to them instead of relying on the fact that your related or started a friendship 20 years ago.
That's not enough.
Healthy relationships of any kind are a give and take, where both participants are in the game.  These days its tough to find kind and caring genuine soul that you trust.  Even if you've grown to have a family or other interests, keep the ones who make the effort to show you love and who's hearts are pure, close to you; go out of your way to reciprocate to the friends who are positive forces in your life.
Those who are continously thoughtful by trying to fill others cups with support and love through what they go thru, need love and encouragement too.  Most of us who are like this aren't being nice because we have to be or that we want a medal but because we find enjoyment out of seeing others happy and because we don't think its that hard to reach out and touch someone.  The positive Polly's of the world stories also matter, so although they may not ask for help, ask for support, ask for you to talk, it's your job to reach out before they are running on "E", before they move on to find companions who give a little friendly reciprocation.
You can't blame us for moving on to surround ourselves with "birds of the same feather."

My Christian perspective is just that God is teaching me that the job you do by intentionally helping others is for me (God), not for them.  This is because He made me with the desires of my heart.  And whether or not they give back a single day of the years you gave, I see ALL, including your intention.  "You don't need anyone, you just need me."  "When you are weary, you turn to me and I will fill you."
1 Peter 5
And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself, restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast.

hmh. Amen
xo Lori

The Fear in Clarity...

You may finally be clear on the direction you want to take your life, but are you free of the new found fear that comes with that new open space...

So a few months back I was still racking my brain trying to figure out, what am I going to do with all these passions?  How do I incorporate the things that make me feel all tingly inside and those that best serve to empower the people around me?...

I was sitting in a seminar for self help (in support of one of my family members) and I said to myself...this is what I want to do...but not like this.  I had reservations in going in fears that it would be a money focused organization.  This felt more like a cult that they pressured people into attending by making anyone who didn't want to invest monetarily, feel like they had issues of denial.  Which wasn't my issue at all.  My struggle was that I felt it was very sales pitchy, it felt inauthentic.  If you read an earlier blog of mine you'd know one of my goals was to right books, travel and do speaking engagements and at some point use my psychology degree and personal experience of growth to impact the lives of others in a positive way.  So like a lightening storm I kept getting ideas throughout the forum and eventually tuned out the "salesman" on stage completely.  Yes, many things he was saying were true and impactful but the approach ruined the authenticity of what my mission will be.

So I went home and started writing things down and dreaming up everything that would make others feel like they can conquer the world...or at least tackle something they've been procrastinating.  Part of my initial struggle in finding the outlet of all of my passions was integrating them into one place.  I happen to be one of those people with 100 passions.  Im amazed at how it all hit me, how passionate I am about helping others (especially since I feel like I spend most of my days doing this with my friends and random strangers at places like Kohls) anyway.  Why am I amazed at how a Psychology major loves thinking about how to best tackle anything in life that tries to hold her back, hold her friends back, and the likes of strangers?  Duh.  People always devulge their troubles and trust me with their deepest secrets and I am grateful to be someone they feel they can trust.  I guess Im just surprised when it's a complete stranger in a store who's quite a bit older than me, asking for advice.  Maybe thats all part of the divine plan, that the universe works tirelessly to connect us to our hearts work,  but only when you're paying enough attention to notice do you see it.  Part of allowing this energy to flow is about how open you are.  That day in that crazy forum, I chose to be open, knowing that I wasn't going to buy into a weekend away, I still was being supportive and open to hearing something that might strike a cord in my life.

In all of the bing, bing, bings, I started to get scared.  What if it doesn't work out?  What if it fails?  What if then everyone laughs at the failure?  How do I start?  etc etc etc.  So many questions were plaguing this passionate heart of mine at once.  When I got home I started telling a few trusted friends about my new mission...to pick their brains.  They loved the idea, mainly because you could hear the excitement in my voice.  I came up with a name and an acronym and an overall mission; this was the easy part because no one really knows at this point so its safe.  The fear continued to slow me down and distract me away from making real public moves.  None of this makes any sense because anyone who knows me understands that I am the last person to care about what people think.  I have always been a perfectionist tho, someone who's fiercely competitive in business and in succeeding in general.  Although these are all true characteristics of my personality, they were all used for someone elses dream, to elevate their passion and fill their pockets.  Why if I am this motivated and confident in my grind for others can I not reallocate that for myself?  Truth is...I can, its just in how much I am willing to go balls to the wall and all for me.  I thought the clarity in knowing what I wanted to do would kill my fears??
(meh, lies!!)

Having courage is about feeling the fear but walking ahead anyway; toward it, essentially to give it the middle finger.  I will truly be doing the work, creating workshops that I have personal experience in, ones that I challenge myself to do exactly what I am advising others to do.  Helping the millennials reinvest in themselves and create a purposeful lifestyle is about instilling confidence and a fresh spirit that is honest about how life is scary and that there are a lot of unknowns but that doesn't mean that it can't be amazing once that fear subsides.  Sparking momentum for those young and old hopefuls who just couldn't get started, by creating action plans and accountability partners.  Bringing education and useful tools to those interested in ALL areas of life; health, fitness, spirituality, healthy eating, life hacks, relationship overhauling, tips and tricks to traveling and financial stability etc.  I know this sounds like "I know it all" right.  WRONG.  I will be doing ALOT of research on the net, continue to read books and pulling from my personal experiences, combining all resources in coming up with useful and interesting material to INSPIRE everyone who's...open.  Most of all, to help others create the momentum thru initially taking action, propelling them forward toward kicking a*s in life!!  Making it all count.

I can't wait to grow, to INSPIRE...to be INSPIRED.

Scared Bi*ch walking...
xo, Lori

Inspiration

Im a virgin blogger.  This is my first post online ever, sharing my thoughts, raw and unedited...

So how I came to be inspired to start this blog is a mixture of things.  For the past couple of years I have been wanting to pinpoint: how do I reach people with my inspiration to make it through life and its tribulations, express myself and do what I love most..help people grow.  I then contemplated writing books, I even came up with names and chapters but have yet to write them.  Maybe this blog will bring me to have the gall and hopefully the following to encourage those notations of my own life's journey.  

A while back I had a spiritual dream where God showed me the stars, told me I would reach all of those stars, that represented people.  Now I want to pursue my passion in counseling, writing books, and doing speaking engagements.  I have no idea how to get started and if any of my words will change a soul but I'm faithful He will guide me.  I thought about the quantity of stars he showed me in that dream and wondered, but how do I reach all of these other stars..is that possible?  hmm

The other day my boyfriend and I were talking about his blog and I started remembering how I'd always wanted to start one and see where it took me.  Where it can take others.  He expressed how he thought I should start it...Why don't I do this?  He sent me the link to his and I read the words and thought, just as interested as I am in reading his blogs, people can and will be interested in reading mine.  Especially because I have the intention on reaching you, yes YOU reading this..in a positive way.  A way that will ask you to step into your own, choose a more authentic path by just being my own actualized self, share my point of view and relate to another soul walking around trying to figure it all out, the best I can.

Skip to this last Sunday...I was sitting in church listening to a visiting pastor preach to us about searching within ourselves to find what God has placed there... How bad do you want to find the gifts the Lord has placed inside you?  Hit me like a brick.  He proceeded to ask us to pray abundantly, be EXTRAVAGANT, ask not for the mediocre, not what you think God can do but over and beyond what you think you deserve.  WOW.  Thats a tough one, especially if you struggle with self worth.  He began to break down the meaning of Qualitative Words:  Your quality of your prayer determines the quality of your answers!  WOAH.  The quality of words determine the quality of the life, the people and the church!!  Well then, I need to ask for not exactly what I want, but more, because what I think is possible for me isn't even close to what He has in store!  It all boils down to how much do we think we deserve and our distortion and/or limited thinking of who we can become and how we are hearing those qualitative words.  Are we open enough to receive intellectual consciousness?  We were then asked to pray our extravagant prayers...I started and immediately had to correct myself...one of my prayers was for a husband and then I added "No God I don't just want a husband, I want a man of God, a beautiful soul to fulfill the dreams in my heart, the dreams you have for me and your will not my own limited one, give me discernment and I will follow you.  I prayed about so many areas of my life that needed revamping.  I prayed like I could ask for the lottery and receive it!  Hey, He said to pray Big..so I did.  :) The pastor said there was a woman here in this room who the Good Lord wants to reach, tonight.  I believed that woman is me!   Maybe this is my first step into walking into my destiny...this tiny little step.  How bad do I want to find the gifts he's ALREADY given me, BAD!  AMEN AMEN AMEN!  
~Ok sorry I get a little side tracked when I feel a word hitting me like that.  I'm still reeling from it...

The title of this blog.  Elevation:  Take me to the top floor...
I pictured life as a tall building with many levels and an elevator.  Each floor as a journey that you pass through...build on... when your ready, you get back on the elevator and go to the next level.  Sure you have the freedom to descend but you're looking to grow and expand, experience all the tears, all the laughs, take all the lessons your learned from floor 1 to floor....
With this blog my hopes for you:
I encourage you to contribute your comments, knowledge, and thoughts whether you agree or disagree.  But be open to growth, because if you stop growing, you die, inside.  Live your potential.
Step into the elevator, close the door and rise...

Below I share the beautiful Freedom tower in nearby NYC.  ...Everyone's building is limitless, you should feel free on your journey and because it is the tallest building in its city for a reason...when investing in anything, the biggest investment should be in oneself.

With purpose, 
Lori